The Mole

The Gimp was out of work after his forced resignation from the Electricity board and his brief career on the building was to be just that Brief.

The Gimp had blown nearly all of the £5000 loan that was meant to be spent going out to Austrailia to see his best mate Darren Gilbride so we needed to do something fast as the Gimp was feeling a bit down with everything that had gone on since the drink driving escapade !

Broadway Celtic 1st team manager Damien Wright had the power to get the Gimp a job as a warehouse operative with Citylink parcel couriers as he was quite high up there though he knew he might end up regretting this act of mercy.

There are several Gimp file moments during his time at Citylink though several facts need to be confimed on a few of these stories but the best Gimp moment at citylink that has being confirmed is as follows

After a period of time at Citylink the Gimp was given a forklift licence by Citylink,this pleased the gimp as after 18months at Citylink he was stll just a warehouse operative with the nickname THE MOLE.

This was due to the Gimp refusing to wear his glasses at work so in order to read the address on the parcels he would have to put the parcel right up close to his eyes.

Oneday whilst driving the forklift the Gimp was called over by somebody for a word,so the Gimp jumped down off the forklift which he had left IN GEAR ! As he jumped down he caught the forward lever with his foot !

The forklift was now out of control and Gimpless,building up speed the Gimp and everybody else could only watch as the forklift went straight through the Plasterboard wall which seperated the warehouse from the staff canteen.

One of Damien Wright's colleagues who was in the canteen remarked later how everybody was having a cup of tea ,reading a paper and tucking into a sarnie when a forklift truck came flying through the wall eventualy coming to rest on the far side of the canteen with a stack a tables and chairs caught up in the forks but alas nobdy was hurt due to it being near the end of lunch hour.

The Gimp somehow kept his job despite destoying the staff canteen and when asked about incident the Gimp could only remark

"SHIT HAPPENS"

Gimp file 8

 One time the gimp got lucky with this girl but he had no condoms and the lady in question wouldn't let him go any further without protection.

So the gimp on the ball for once went looking round the house for some johnny's but there were none.

The gimp then went to the kitchen drawer and wrapped his erect todger in cling film,he then made his way back to the dark bedroom where he told the young lady that he'd being sucessful in his search,she put her hand down to feel and swallowed the story which was not to be the only thing she unintentionally swallowed that night according to the gimp.